Here's more of Maxine, courtesy of fate:


As You Slide Down the Banister of Life, Remember:


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1. Â*Jim Baker and Jimmy Swaggert have written an impressive new book. It's called, "Ministers Do More Than Lay People."
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2. Transvestite: A guy who likes to eat, drink, and be Mary.
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3. The difference between the Pope and your boss: The Pope only expects you to kiss his ring.


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4. My mind works like lightning. One brilliant flash and it's gone.
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5. The only time the world beats a path to your door is if you're in the bathroom.


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6. I hate sex in the movies. Tried it once. The seat folded up, the drink spilled, and that ice, well, it really chilled the mood.
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7. Â*It used to be only death and taxes. Now, of Â*course, there's shipping and handling, too.



8. A husband is someone who, after taking the trash out, gives the impression that he just cleaned the whole house.
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9. Â*My next house will have no kitchen - Â*just vending machines and a large trash can.


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10. A blonde said, "I was worried that my mechanic might try to rip me off. I was relieved when he told me all I needed was turn signal fluid."
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11. Definition of a teenager? God's punishment...for enjoying sex. Â*
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12. As you slide down the banister of life, may the splinters never point the wrong way.
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